Things that make me angry Vol 1. (There will be a Vol 2)

So just lately I've found myself climbing back on my soapbox again (I never really left it), and ranting to my soon to be wife about crap that really grinds my gears! And I thought to myself, why should the long suffering fiance have to be the only one to hear about everything I think is wrong with the world? So I've had the bright idea to share the anger among you, my devoted reader (yeah right!). As I have quite a few subjects that bring out my ire, I think this could easily become a series, and in the process revive the blog from its cyber grave.

Okies, useless introduction thing out of the way, here's part one!

Reality TV

Now I think all who know me know that I'm not exactly a fan of reality TV, you know as it's absolute fucking garbage and aimed at people who've supped too much Special Brew that they think the Jeremy Kyle show is the height of culture! Ok so I'm generalising just a bit there, I know some good people who watch this shit, but even good people can have execrable taste at times!

Anyhow the reality TV 'phenomenon' has taken over our screens, it seems to be on every channel at every time of day and its main purpose seems to be to make brain dead cretins into Z list celebrities. You know the type, those who think that showing off their abs and/or plastic tits on national TV gives them the right to turn up at trashy nightclubs and expect to be given preferential treatment, complete with the token paparazzi to photograph them falling over at the end of the night after way to many WKD's!

I'm heading off on a bit of a tangent here, so back on topic, with the next paragraph.

Actually you know, I don't think I have one specific topic here, I'm just ranting for rantings sake, it's actually quite cathartic!

I did try and watch Love Island earlier, to try and get an idea on why this crap is so popular, however I had to switch over after five minutes, the amount of preening, mooning, bitchiness and all around moronic behaviour made my eyes bleed and my brain melted down through my nostrils! I mean holy shit are these people actually real? I've been around a few places and nowhere have I encountered such pathetic examples of humanity. I could be wrong here, but I think there's only one brain cell on that island, and all the 'contestants' have shared access to it! All they seem to care about is getting a shag on live TV! Is this what the youth of today aspire to now? Or am I just turning in to a grumpy old bastard with no concept of today's new cultural landscape?

You know the worst thing about this reality television shite? It's killing off creativity! It seems to be easier nowadays for TV execs to put something like this on our screens (or anyone of the various 'talent shows'), instead of something interesting and well made that requires a bit of investment on the part of the viewer to fully appreciate it. I know there is good TV around, but how much of it is actually shown on the mainstream channels? American Gods, Game of Thrones, Lucifer, all shows that have a good idea behind them, all getting good reviews, and yet are any of them shown on the Beeb? On ITV? Of course they're not! They're all on channels that require some form of payment, which is pure bollocks!

Anyways, I'm ending this here, it's all getting a bit incoherent and my writing skills have become a bit rusty. Apologies to anyone who does suffer reading through this crap, suffice to say, my next effort shall be far better, I just wanted to do something to set the creative juices flowing again!

Step away from the idiot box!

TV is shit!

Hundreds of channels on the idiot box and how many of them show programmes that are actually worth paying even the slightest bit of interest to? Not bloody many!

Don't get me wrong, there are some interesting and innovative shows on TV, shows that are a delight to watch, but they'll rarely be seen and thus soon cancelled. Unless it's a dreary soap opera, a reality show featuring the dregs of society or a talent show were looks are far more important than any actual talent. Those you know will be pushed by TV executives to all the willing sheep who sit with the remote glued to their hand and the phone next to them, ready to ring each other up and discuss why Ken took a 15 year old Escort to Kevin's garage!

Since none of those who believe Coronation Street is real will ever read this blog, I think I can safely say that the last sentence of the above paragraph will never be appreciated!

Why exactly are soaps and the like so popular? I mean why would you want to live vicariously through a fictional council estate resident when you already fucking live on a council estate? Are your lives really that dull that you can only get enjoyment from watching people pretending to be like you are? Fucking mind boggling!

I realise I'm possibly being slightly offensive here, but watching people get brain washed by crap (those who have brains) is quite depressing. Does anyone have the patience to read books these days? Does anyone have the desire to leave the house and actually visit somewhere new? Or is everyone more concerned about who's shagging who in Eastenders?

It's no wonder we can't have intelligent protests about important issues anymore, we're all too busy wondering who'll win in the national soap awards! A pointless exercise in TV rewarding pointless exercises in TV!

And what the fuck is the deal with "reality TV"? Seriously is watching people eat, drink, sleep and talk like morons that interesting that it deserves to have 10 years (so far) of TV devoted to it? I mean Big Brother, a pointless show making pointless celebrities for fuck knows how many years and The only way is Essex, a collection of the dumbest people known to man! I'm feeling brain cells die just typing this paragraph!

I'm ranting now and enjoying it!

Talent shows? Are they actually anything more than a chance to put a smug, arrogant bastard like Simon Cowell on TV so he can sneer at people and occasionally have eggs thrown at him? Is there any talent that succeeds on the X-Factor? On Bee Gee Tee? Isn't it odd how all those who win such shows generally look like walking cosmetic surgery adverts? Talent is a long forgotten thing these days.

I'm going to finish up now with a few points:

1. Soap Opera's are not real. Who's shagging who, who killed who and who is the daddy of the baby are all things that are decided upon by writers and producers. They are fake!
2. Reality TV shows are nothing more than an attempt to try and cause controversy on national TV. The producers of such shows just want an excuse to try and provoke violence and sex.
3. Talent shows are fixed. It doesn't matter if you have perfect pitch and tone, it doesn't matter if you can stir up intense emotions in people just by your singing. If you look like you've been repeatedly battered with a shovel then you're not getting on TV to show your abilities. People are shallow and only looks sell.

Right I've had my rant, people might not like what I've said, but I too am allowed my opinion!

TV is dead, R.I.P. TV!